Community Leaders, Parents & School Chiefs Offer Advice to New Grads

High school lawns and athletic fields and auditoriums were jam packed this weekend as local school districts held graduation ceremonies and students, community leaders and school leaders took to the podium to give sage advice to those heading off to college and career paths.

So Patch reached out to residents, parents, school leaders and community activists to get their advice to those heading into the real world of education and the workplace.

Here’s what readers shared back:

Bayport-Blue Point Superintendent Dr. Vincent Butera:

Always strive to surround yourselves with people who are smarter, who are going to make you want to work harder, and whose company alone makes you feel better.

Sayville High School Principal Ronald Hoffer:

Congratulations Class of 2013! Embrace, celebrate, and treasure this freshman moment.  Yes, even as seniors who have successfully completed the rigors and demands of the curricula over the past 13 years,  you are about to embark on a new stage of life; hence the freshman moment.  A freshman moment is not to be feared, but cherished as it signifies new opportunities and challenges. Congratulations once again graduates and best of luck with your FRESHMAN MOMENT."  

Bayport Civic Association President Bob Draffin:

My advice to the BBP Class of '13 would simply be, "Go for it!"  Whether you are continuing on with your education or embarking upon a new career, you are at the perfect time in your life when you can be bold in setting your goals and making them a reality.  Your parents, family, school and community have given you all the tools you need to choose your path to success.  I wish each and every graduate all the best in their pursuit of those dreams.

Sayville Greater Chamber of Commerce President Bill Etts:

Integrity and ethical behavior with strong work habits will take you far.

Superintendent of Sayville School Dr. Walter Schartner:

In society today you must be a life-long learner to adapt to the many changes. As you embark on your journey in higher education, the workplace, or the military, find your passion and pursue it.

Rev Gary Brinn/Sayville Congregational United Church of Christ:

In the next few weeks, you'll be getting tons of advice. Some will come in the form of little cutesy gift books bought at the Hallmark shop by distant relatives. Some will come from that blowhard uncle who has an opinion on everything and has one-beer-too-many at your graduation party. And some will come in columns like this. In all likelihood, you'll blow it all off. That's okay. Most of the advice will be good, and that wisdom will still be floating out there in the universe when you need to hear it.

Here are some things I wish people had told me when I was your age:

1)     Have adventures. There will be plenty of time later in life to get trapped in the cycle of debt and consumerism. Go spend some time in the Peace Corps, as a Jesuit Volunteer, backpacking on the Appalachian Trail, sleeping in a hostel in Paris. You'll learn and love and when it's all over, you'll be a better person. Ironically enough, seeing how amazing the rest of the world is will also open your eyes to how amazing your hometown is.

2)     Decide what kind of person you want to be. Seventy years from now, when three friends and family members are delivering eulogies at your funeral, what do you want them to say about your character? Now here's the big secret: that person is already inside of you. Start acting like him or her and that's who you will become. Want to be an artist? Start acting like an artist. Want to be known for your compassion? See yourself as already being compassionate. “Fake it until you make it” actually works.

3)     As a corollary to #2, surround yourself with the kind of people you want to become. Sure you chose your friends during your school years, but the pool you were choosing from wasn't that big. Some of your current friends don't share your values, and you're going to have to get past your sense of loyalty to get on with your life. This is really hard to hear, and even harder to do. But you're going to become more and more like your “crew,” and if that crew is obsessed with partying or being cool or getting laid, you are going to lose valuable years you can never get back.

4)     Do better. My generation and the ones that came before it have been awful. We've worshiped the “god” in the mirror, promoting selfishness, individualism and greed. The result is that while we live longer and own more, we are miserable. And we are destroying our planet's ability to sustain life. We've done our best to screw you up too, with “helicopter” parents insisting that its all about you all the time and you should never ever be held accountable for your actions. And yet, you're turning out okay, with better values than us. It's going to be your world soon, and the sooner the better. Vote, run for office, save us from our miserable selves.

5)     Seriously bad things can happen. Some days are going to be hard. But you have a decision to make. If you see things as miserable and terrible, they will be. If you see every day as filled with possibility, that will be your experience. Believing is seeing.  Faced with a crippled man, Jesus didn't make a big show out of the healing. He said “Get up, take up your mat, and walk.” Get up, face forward, and keep going. Something amazing is going to happen. Are you ready?

Dawn Delouise Banks:

I gave this quote by Marrianna Williamson to my daughter on her HS graduation .. She said it left a powerful impression on her.. I know it left one on me.

“Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It's not just in some of us; it's in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.”

True success is not about material aquisitions.. Its about discovering what your gifts are and sharing with the world, contributing to the greater good of humanity..It doesn't have to be earth shattering.. Even the smallest unnoticed contributions have the greatest impact...Together we can make the world a better place.

Kristin Pearsall Costigan:

My favorite gift from when I graduated high school (and a gift I give to graduates regularly) is the Dr. Seuss book "Oh The Places You Will Go". The best quote is "You have brains in your head, yo have feet in your shoes, you can steer yourself in any direction you choose.... You're off to great places! Today is your day! Your mountain is waiting so... get on your way!"

Kasey Tucker:

Bring light bulbs to college... You don't think you need them... But you will.

Artie Kopelman:

The status quo is no longer acceptable. Go out and change the world.

Alia Fisco Richards:

Be careful racking up those student loans. That's not Monopoly money, grads! Go to any school willing to give you scholarship money. Unless you're going Ivy League, where you go to school makes no difference.