Helping Your Child Like What They See in the Mirror

Think back to elementary school gym class when your instructor named two captains to choose teams for the daily kickball game. Were you athletic and among the first to be picked? Or did you worry that your name would be the last to be called?  For better or worse, scenarios like this play themselves out countless times during a child’s formative years.

In 2004, the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention reported that 18 percent of children between 6 and 11 years old were overweight. While childhood obesity is a serious problem, parents of all children should make it a priority to help their kids develop healthy habits and a positive attitudes toward physical activity. One of the best ways to do this is through instilling in your child the belief that he or she can be successful. And the most effective way to achieve this is through non-competitive activities that build confidence and competence one skill at a time.

Why is it important for kids to build skills step by step? 

Children learn to value developing skills and abilities at a young age. There is a reason that schools teach the ABCs before asking students to write a book report. Beyond the basic reason – you need to know one before you can do the other – learning things step by step prevents kids from feeling overwhelmed with the difficulty of a task and helps them feel a sense of accomplishment every time they complete a component of it.

The same is true of physical activities; you’ve got to learn to walk before you can run. A recent study found that it is extremely important to emphasize learning, understanding, development, effort and individual ability when engaging kids in organized sports or physical activity.1

Why is a supportive environment better than a competitive one?

Life at its very core is competitive. Whether it’s jockeying for the best seat on the bus, getting a starting spot on the T-ball team or entering the Spelling Bee, kids have ample opportunities to compete. But a competitive environment doesn’t necessarily build a child’s confidence.

Kids thrive in encouraging environments. For them, success is about more than winning or losing. When asked to define success, most kids point to mastering a task or activity, which makes being able to ride a bike or paint a picture more important than riding their bike the fastest or painting a picture that wins first prize. Effectively completing a task helps children develop their sense of self-efficacy and confidence. Moreover, kids whose activities take place in a non-competitive environment are more likely to stick with the activities because they find them rewarding and fun, and are able to feel successful while completing them.1

Can physical activity help boost a child’s self-image?

How did you feel the last time you exercised? Did you feel invigorated? Confident in your body and in your ability to use it? The answer for both is probably yes, and the reason is because there are strong links between physical ability levels and physical self-image. It is the same for kids, largely because physical activity involves a series of challenges with immediate results:

• Can I climb that tree? Can I catch that ball? Can I do a cartwheel? Physical activities like these are simple, and children associate them with play.
• Kids who have high levels of physical activity scored much higher on a scale measuring their self-image, not to mention their physical performance and weight control.1

What should parents keep in mind when choosing physical activities for their kids?

Parents must carefully evaluate the organized physical activities their children participate in to ensure they are appropriate for each child’s age and physical ability.

In addition, physical learning should be success-oriented and without the overwhelming fear of failure. Make sure that instructors or coaches consider each child’s development level and their ability level. Consider the following:

• Does this sport or activity provide a significant learning opportunity for my child?
• Does this sport or activity promote physical, social and intellectual development?
• Does my child have the ability and motivation to maximize his or her chances for
  success in this activity?
• Is this sport or activity fun for my child?

Finally, make sure activities your kids are involved in focus on bettering themselves – not necessarily competing against other children. Consider programs which are non-competitive and focus on each child’s individual development.

A child’s physical ability often can be the first way they compare themselves to other hildren. Their physical proficiency – or lack thereof – can be easily assessed by their peers. Helping children feel good about their physical abilities is key to promoting a positive self-image.

1 Perceptual and Motor Skills, 2005